


Light It Up

by KattyBorz



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Fix-It of Sorts, M/M, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-23
Updated: 2018-07-23
Packaged: 2019-06-15 01:26:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15401940
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KattyBorz/pseuds/KattyBorz
Summary: "I go to sleep, I check it. In the middle of the night, I check it. I feel the buzz in my bed and I don't get no rest. I always got it on me just in case you want me. So if you're looking for my love then light it up." --Luke BryanI'm unashamed of this.





	Light It Up

**Author's Note:**

> Because I'm from the country a lot of my works are inspired by country songs. This is inspired by Luke Bryan's Light it Up. If you got a chance you need to look it up.

Steve stood in front of the large windows watching the Wakandan sunset. Here, it seems like the glow of the reds and oranges are duller than those Steve grew up watching and the few he watched with Tony on the mornings when neither could find sleep. He wasn't sure if it was because of the reflection panels around the country that keep it hidden from the world or if it's because he is without not only his best friend but also the love of his life. Bucky had decided to return to cryo-sleep until he could be safer to the public and Steve had to respect his decision no matter how much he may not like it. And Tony…

_Tony._

He shoved his hand into his front pocket of his jeans and pulled out his phone, the screen was dark and when he unlocked it he found no missed messages or calls or voicemails. He heaved a sigh and dropped it back in his pocket, every day that passes he checks more and more for some kind of word from Tony, even if it's just to scream at him and curse him. Anything is better than nothing. At least it'd put his mind at ease. He had sent a letter to Tony as an apology and an outdated phone, he had hoped he would've received some kind of message complaining about Steve's choice in technology… and yet…

The others had started to worry about him. It started when Sam walked in on him staring at his phone intently, willing the thing to ring or beep or chime or even just light up. When asked, Steve told him that he was just bored and didn't know what to do or where to go. That was probably his first mistake, now one of the others dragged him out of T'Challa's apartments that he set up for them and forced him to participate in something.

Wanda would take him to a small park where they would sit on a bench and just watch the people go about their days, they didn't talk often and if they did it was they're observations on where a citizen was headed to.

Sam just takes him out and they walk, no end destination or a set pace. They leisurely stroll and talk about minor things here and there about the country and how beautiful it is, Steve couldn't help thinking to himself that Tony would love to be here and watch the evolution of technology before his own eyes. Hell, maybe even participate. Those types of thoughts always led him back to the itch in his pocket created by his phone. He knew not to pull it out around the others, they would just take it from him and wouldn't give it back until they returned to their rooms.

Clint took him to a bare field where he had erected a few stumps from the surrounding jungle, each equal feet apart but varying distances. Steve couldn't help the small smile at the fact that Hawkeye created his own shooting range. Admittedly that was what helped get Tony off his mind, just some friendly competition and laughs over the other's failings. It was short lived of course when Steve had lined up a shot at the furthest set log and he heard a chime come from behind him. His shot went wide as he leaped around to scramble for his phone when his eyes landed on Clint smiling fondly at his own. Mrs. Barton sends him a picture of his kids every month and Steve's good mood vanquished.

Point is, that his obsession with wanting to hear from Tony was getting the better of him. One night as he was sitting on the couch watching late night TV, he broke down and sent a message to Tony. He had typed and retyped it until he had the perfect way of saying what he wanted without coming off as insensitive or callous.

_I miss you._

_It wasn't worth losing you._

_I'm sorry._

He placed his phone on the couch cushion beside him and waited. It wasn't until the early hours of the morning that he realized that he had fallen asleep. His eyes darted over to the phone, still dark, and checked it. Nothing. He shouldn't be surprised, after all it would take a lot more than a few apologies and regret to get Tony to talk to him. He had extended an olive branch, he just had to pray that Tony recognized that and met him halfway.

A week had passed since his message had been sent and he hadn't heard a thing. Steve was so agitated and anxious that he couldn't sit still. He would pace as a hundred scenarios played out in his mind's eyes. He knew that Tony didn't waver far from technology, it was in his blood to build and improve. Of course, he had entertained the fact that maybe Tony had tossed the phone but he knew Tony read the message. His phone notified him of that fact with a little check mark by Tony's contact name signifying that Tony had received and opened the message. Steve was going insane. He wished he could get some kind of response.

The phone never left his side after that. He slept with it under his pillow so he'd wake up if he received a message, he took it in the bathroom with him with the volume turned all the way up so he'd hear it in the shower, it was wedged between his leg and the seat of the SUV on the way to the palace and back so he'd feel the vibration directly. He always had it in his hand or pressed up against a part of his body at all times. He very nearly caused a wreck when on one of their trips to T'Challa's palace Clint leaned over and plucked the phone out from under Steve's thigh and dangled it away from him. Steve had launched himself across the SUV and on top of Clint as he stretched to get his phone. Clint had been mocking him the entire time about acting like a teenage school girl with a crush and Steve had landed a punch in the archer's gut. As Clint curled in on himself, Steve pulled his phone out of Clint's grip and sat back in his seat. Sam had been unimpressed as were the two palace guards in the front seats as they glared back at him. He merely shrugged and looked at his phone one more time.

The background on his phone screen was a picture of him and Tony in Central Park. They were wearing hats and sunglasses and muted clothing as they walked hand in hand along the pathways. When they had reached the Bow Bridge, Tony pulled him over to the railing and they watched couples and friends in row boats. Steve watched for a brief moment before he turned his attention to Tony, a small smile was playing on his lips as he watched an elderly couple talk and laugh in a boat below. Tony's eyes crinkled at the edges with happiness and there was a light of hope the brown iris'. He was beautiful and Steve wished he could capture this moment and keep it with him forever, knowing that he would have to act fast he reached into his pocket and pulled out the phone Tony insisted he get. He opened the camera and quickly snapped a photo, Tony had turned and looked at him with a wide grin when he saw the flash and a fondness rested in his eyes. It had turned out to be Steve's favorite picture of the man and he immediately had Tony set it as his background.

Steve's heart ached when he thought back on the happier times with his love and he wished things would've ended up differently. He wished that Tony had sided with him or he with Tony just to make things a little simpler, that and they'd be together in one place. He wished he would've taken the time to talk to Tony about the Accords and he wished he would've really listened when Tony tried to tell him something. He wished that Bucky's return would've happened sooner or later than the Accords' debut and he wished Peggy's death didn't amplify the feeling of loss. He wished fate and destiny would've had something else in store for him other than making him feel more alone than ever. He lost is only connections to the past and he lost the most important connection to the future and he didn't know which way to turn.

He locked his phone and nearly cried when the screen went dark. His entire mental stability relied on that phone and the hope that maybe, just maybe, Tony would call him and tell him to come home.

Steve stood from the bench outside the building that T'Challa put them up in and turned to head back to his room to mope for a couple more hours before one of the others pulled him away for his mandatory venture into the city. It was Scott's turn and he wasn't sure if he could handle another sparring session with the guy, even if his body and soul were in the game. The elevator dropped him off on the floor where his half of the Avengers were residing and he slowly walked down the hall, his eyes glued to the white tiled floor. He fumbled with his key as he neared his door and strolled into his dark apartment. He tossed with keys to the side on the table and kicked his shoes off and left them where they landed. As he walked by the couch to enter the kitchen a light flickered on and his head whipped to the side.

Sitting in the only chair in the apartment was Tony. He wore grease stained jeans and an oversized shirt with the old SHEILD emblem emblazoned on the front, he was dressed for comfort and not business. The hope in Steve's chest inflated and then took off when he realized that Tony was wearing one of his shirts. He froze in place, unsure if he should grab Tony up in a hug or to stay put and let him explain why he was sitting in Steve's apartment or if he should say something first to break the ice that began to settle around them.

Tony stood and walked down the hall toward Steve's bedroom and Steve refused to think that that meant what he hoped it meant. He didn't want to cause Tony to leave so soon after he arrived. Halfway down the hall, Tony turned around and beckoned Steve with a "come hither" smile and a hand extended toward him. Steve's face broke out into a grin and together they walked into the bedroom and laid upon the bed. Steve pulled Tony to his chest and wrapped his arms around his back tightly, Tony snuggled up as close as physically possible and hid his face in Steve's neck. He sighed once and spoke softly into the darkness.

"I miss you too." He whispered and planted a soft kiss on the junction of Steve's neck and shoulder. Steve swallowed thickly as the emotions welled up. "And I'm sorry too."

Steve crushed Tony to him and placed an answering kiss to the mess of brown curls under his chin.

"I know."


End file.
